Mom #1 wants to know how I lost 20 lbs. I should mention that I have 25 more to go.
1. Keep a headache diary and realize that eating chocolate gives you massive, writhing on the bed in pain, migraines. Once your brain makes this connection, the thought of eating chocolate will make you nauseous. You'll lose about 6 pounds just from cutting out chocolate. Then you'll finally realize just how MUCH chocolate you used to eat.
2. Work spring break camp at the zoo. The exercise will cause you to lose about 3 more pounds.
3. Now, that you've lost a little weight, your blood pressure will get too low, especially at night. While you are screwing around with your blood pressure medicine, you will mess up so badly trying to keep it and your caffeine consumption (Dr. Pepper) balanced, that you are nearly fainting at night. In desperation, cut out all caffeine which cuts out your daily Dr. Pepper's. You'll lose about 4 more pounds. On the positive side, you can also cut your blood pressure medicine dosage in half.
4. Read Feast Without Yeast and start eating healthy. You'll lose about 4 more pounds.
5. Have a family catastrophe that will cause you so much stress that you are sick to your stomach and can't eat for a few days. You'll lose a couple of more pounds.
6. Eat whatever the hell you want, because the ongoing stress will just keep pulling the weight off.
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3 comments:
Hahaha I love #6 but remember the stress won't always be there. On the other hand, I could send Dad to live with you for a while if you need extra stress! :)
Love you,
Mom
Hey you! Don't forget to look after yourself! Even while you are stressing! (vitamin B supplements) Gee I wish that worked for me....I seem to do the opposite, I put on a couple of kilos instead and yes I turned to chocolate, which by the way even at my age gives me pimples! Not good.
#7 Get angry then take your anger out on housework (yeah that one does work for me)
That's so hilarious in the kind of way that you end up on your knees crying instead of laughing. (You're a mom, I KNOW you know what I mean.)
Hopefully the stress part will die down sooner rather than later. The rest I'm going to have to give a try.
Well .. I don't take high blood pressure medicine, and I don't eat chocolate or drink caffeine.
I guess I already know the answer, I just didn't want to accept it - I'm fat for no good reason and I'm not trying very hard to change it.
*SIGH* ;-)
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