Sorry for the lack of blogging. We found out Friday evening that a close friend had died, so David and I have been struggling to come to terms with the loss. I've been wanting to write about it, but wasn't sure I could without breaking down again. I think I finally can now.

When I met David, he had already been seeing a massage therapist every other Friday for a couple of years. I started going too, and we took turns getting massaged. We almost always both went, because just sitting in the office was relaxing. Our massage therapist's name was Wanda. She was 66 when I met her, but was in good health and sharp as a whip. David and I usually went a little early and stayed late just to visit with Wanda. She was semi-retired and only saw four clients a day four days a week. Some went every week and some like us, went every other week. Even KJ had some massages from Wanda. She practiced Reiki massage so going to her revived our spirits in addition to relaxing our bodies.

Wanda was so loving and generous of heart, but she wouldn't hesitate to tell you what you needed to do, whether you wanted to hear it or not. She told many stories, listened to our ups and downs, and always had a joke to tell. Wanda was a voracious reader so we discussed books a lot. She was always loaning me books and got me started reading several new authors. Wanda was a fixture of our life for 6 years for me and 8 for David...every payday was time to get Wandaized.

When we left Wanda on Friday, June 22, we hugged good-bye like always with our usual, "see you in two weeks," and "call me if you need anything." The next week was uneventful for me, but the second week (the week of the 4th), I noticed Wanda's SUV was always in front of her trailer, even when she should have been at her office. (I passed by her trailer nearly everyday.) I thought maybe she had taken off for the week, and told David that we had better call on Friday just to make sure. Wanda had gone on vacation before and forgotten to tell us. When David called her office, it said the number was no longer in service. Huh? We called her at home and got her answering machine with her usual message telling telemarketers to hang up now, because she wouldn't be calling back. I left a message, and we decided to check at her office.

When we arrived, we found a note and her obituary on her door. The man in the office just down from her saw us and explained what happened. The Tuesday after we had seen Wanda, she had a stroke. She was in the hospital and then moved to a nursing home to recover. That Friday she had a second stroke and died. She was buried the following Tuesday, July 3rd. Wanda had died a week after we had seen her last. The man explained that her daughter found Wanda's appointment book, but there weren't any phone numbers in it. They looked all over the office, but couldn't find phone numbers anywhere. He theorized that Wanda had just memorized them all...wouldn't surprise me. We have VOIP and aren't listed anyway so nobody could contact us.

David and I spent the weekend in shock and crying. We couldn't believe she was gone. It seems like everything reminded me of Wanda...fed the chickens and I remembered Wanda's rooster story, took out a pen and it had Wanda's info on it, wrote in my pocket calendar and it's the one Wanda gave me...On a funny note, David and I were buying some essential oil for his office, when he said, "What does this remind you of?" I smelled and said, "Wanda's office." Just then my cell phone rang, and the display said, "Wanda Ruffing calling." We both had a deer-in-the-headlights look and froze. Was Wanda calling us from beyond? I answered and it turned out to be her daughter who had gotten the message I left on Wanda's machine. She was making sure that I knew Wanda had passed on.

Her daughter also emailed me, and I told her that I still had some of Wanda's books. She told me to keep them as that is what Wanda would have wanted. David, KJ, and I decorated Wanda's grave a little today. I can almost hear her chastising us for that. I know she's not there, but the act made ME feel better anyway plus gave us all some closure. I know Wanda would want me to remember and move on, and would probably be as mad as a wet hen if I keep wallowing in grief. It's hard though, I miss her...

P.S. I almost made it through without crying.
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Here's the obituary.
Wanda Lou (Fielding) Ruffing, 72, of Waco, passed away at a local nursing home, surrounded by family, following a brief illness. Graveside services will be 1:30 p.m. Tuesday, July 3, at Waco Memorial Park with the Bro. Michael Moore officiating. Visitation will be from 6 to 8 p.m. Monday at Pecan Grove Funeral Home Chapel, 3124 Robinson Dr., Waco. Wanda was born Nov. 10, 1934, in Estelline, Texas. She grew up in Estelline and Buckeye, Ariz. She was a massage therapist up until her death, and as a massage therapist, her hands and heart touched many lives. She was a caring and loving mother. She was preceded in death by her parents, W.R. Greenroyd and wife, Ovelle Bragg Greenroyd of Estelline. Wanda leaves behind three brothers, Bob Greenroyd, Bob Thrasher and Eldo Thrasher, and their families; one sister, Fern Conaway and family; three daughters, Vonda Dashman, Becky Woodall and Phyllis Grossman, and their families; and one son, Jerry Fielder and his family. She has many grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She also left behind her loving pets, Suzi, her dog, and Sampson, her cat. In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to Fuzzy Friends Rescue, 6321 Airport Dr., Waco, TX 76708, 254-754-9444. Online Family Register Book at www.pecangrovefuneral.com November 10, 1934 - June 29, 2007